Classmates:
Many
classmates attended John Psychas' funeral on Monday,
March 6. It was such a sad day for so many. Close to 300 attended the
funeral. It was standing room only. Over two dozen from JHS '63 were there
and many other classmates had stopped by during the visitation times. Ted
Demos, JHS '64 and cousin of John's, played a large role in the service with
his singing and reading of the rituals. There was also a choir singing from the
back of the room.
John
had been working on his funeral arrangements for some
time. His directions were said to total twelve pages. Donna Psychas said the family tried to have the service just like
John wanted it and it took many of his nephews and family to read everything
John had written and then carry out his wishes. There were many pictures
of John in the church, and we all loved seeing them.
One
of the special features of the service involved the Prayer of
Absolution. The priest said that John wanted to be sure that a printed copy of
this Absolution Prayer be placed in the casket with him. Therefore he held
a printed copy of it in his hand, apparently as documented proof for
St. Peter that his sins, both "voluntary and
involuntary," had been absolved.
Another
special feature reflected John's penchant for giving away $2 bills as
tips or as gifts for children. He called it the "Greek
handshake." At one point in the service, all children younger than 18 were
invited to come forward and receive their last "Greek
Handshake" from Uncle John. This was such a sad time as John had so
many young nieces and nephews and friends who loved him so. Even after this
distribution of $2 bills, John was well equipped for the future with
several more bills in his hand and in his pocket. At the end of the
service, each of the adults received a copy of a bill with John's face in place
of
A
particularly touching part for us was our singing of the JHS Alma Mater
near the end of the service. We all thought John would have liked that, and the
priest thought it was a wonderful way for us to pay our respects to John.
We all had trouble singing it through our tears. The priest broke down as he
ended the service with a reading of John's obituary. John had been on the
church board and the priest knew him very well and obviously respected and
loved him very much and will miss him very much.
Please
let us know if you have any memories of the event that should be included.
Thanks.
Lynn
and John White
Here
are some photos:
Above is
a shot of the church during the visitation on Sunday afternoon.
Janet
Forbes ordered a flower arrangement. It contained black and orange
flowers with "JHS '63" on the ribbon. The card was
inscribed, "Sail, Vikings, down the field, sail to your goal." Class
members chipped in for it.
A
light snow was falling as we paid our final respects. John is interred at
Note:
John’s
friend Mike Illuzzi was his choice to deliver the
eulogy. Mike could not make it to the funeral but later fulfilled his
responsibility with the words below:
EULOGY FOR JOHN PSYCHAS. 1945-2006
By Dr. Michael C. Illuzzi, Ph.D. a friend
John Psychas
was my friend, your friend and a friend to all
with whom the routine of life brought into familiar contact. And if he
counted you among his coterie of friends, well, as I know all of you are
aware, you were most fortunate. There was just a special something about
John’s personality-----his common sense approach to life that somehow
amazed and somehow resonated with each and every one of us who knew him and
loved him. He was able to cut through the “BS” and always called a “spade”
a “spade”. Indeed, he invariably would put the finishing touches on what
was being discussed or debated----------it may not have been esoteric
enough for the New York Times but that did not matter because what he
concluded or deduced was always correct and most definitely the simplest;
no ruffles and flourishes with Psychas, just
the gosh darn simple truth!
From the day we met in 1991 I always
told him that he had a
distributive mind-----Sometimes I wished that I had never said this! I say
this because from 1991 until his tragic death this spring he told everyone
about his “distributive mind”. He would say, ”guess
what the Dr. said I
had; a distributive mind”. OK? So what is a distributive mind you
ask-------well, I meant that John’s thought process would and could break
any system down into its simplest parts or components. He knew
instinctively how to bring from complexity, simplicity. And he did this as
I said before so effortlessly in every aspect of his working and personal
life. But and this is a big but----he was no simple friend, indeed, he
brought honor to the word friend-----------an honor that his Greek cousin
Aristotle would have been most proud. To paraphrase Aristotle and to quote
John directly after all they were related--------“friendship is the art of
being sincerely interested in the personal and spiritual development of
another person. You love your friend platonically so that your friendship
becomes an end onto itself; you expect nothing from your friend except the
good graces of their company”. And so as it went with Aristotle it goes
with our friend John Psychas----------with Johnny
there was never a means
to an end; John’s friendship was an end onto itself and it was an end that
provided constant joy and memorable times that will redound to our benefit
for years to come. One of my greatest joys in life, yes folks, it was a
great joy was coffee and the proverbial cigarette with John in front of me.
This was the epitome of the old adage,” simple acts of kindness done in
quiet devotion to one another”; a quietude that it is now impossible for me
to bear.
Naturally, every human has their
“Achilles heel” or
two-------and we all know that John had his one or two------OK----more like
ten----but for John while these “weaknesses” may have overall been
detrimental to him (and please note that I do not know because I am not
God) these blemishes, these indiscretions were
all part of his
irresistible charm, part of his capacity to be alive and real! Because of a
life often deprived of even the most simple amenities how could I or anyone
else “trash” him as he inhaled gallons of Haagen Daaz ice cream, bags of
potato chips, coffee, cigarettes or the large prime rib steak with salt
that was the size of Texas! He enjoyed these pleasures and worked hard
for
the opportunity to enjoy them and in the end because of our love for him we
determined that he deserved these “things” that were somehow perhaps not
good for him. But that being said I wish that right now I could pass him
the salt as I always did every time we ate together.
John also reminded me of another great
person from historical
lore----that of William Shakespeare. As you know Shakespeare is well known
for his contributions to enlarging the vocabulary of the English language.
Well our friend John Psychas had it all over
Shakespeare-------John’s
contribution to the English language, or better stated, to the language’s
idiomatic structure is legendary. Phrases like “you don’t know how much you
don’t know” or “that’ll work” or “well that’s got Crow written all over it”
will continue to resonate with us until we meet him again.
Above I used the term legendary and
that is a great way to
terminate our tribute to John--------He was a legend with his friends, his
relatives, in his hometown and in the places he adopted along the way of
life. His intimate involvement with civil rights in
Motor City Business Forum in
impact wherever he found himself whether selling hot dogs and coke as a
carnival barker in the
of AIDS on his friends and neighbors. Often legends are unbearable to be
with----they are arrogant or conceited but not so with Johnny for with John
there was never any drama, no “over the top” acting out. He was quite
simply always the same and this consistency, this steadfast commitment to
stability especially in his love for us is probably his greatest testament.
John Psychas was consistent in sharing his common
sense approach to life,
consistent in offering simple solutions to what ailed us and consistent in
seeing things that somehow blinded us. AND now as he falls asleep we must
take solace in that our remaining waking hours we shall always have his
soul and wit, his “sight”, his brilliance and his sense of humor with us
now and forever more.
Goodbye, for now, my friend, and may
we hope that we have
learned enough from you to carry on without---to fend for ourselves, to see
through superficiality and to love each other as we loved you with the same
class and passion that characterized your entire life.
Respectfully submitted,
Dr. Michael C. Illuzzi or as Johnny used to say ”THE
DOCTOR”
**********
Here’s a
photo of John at Sea World during our 60th birthday celebration in
